That long conversation

Remember that classmate of mine, that i had a crush in him long time ago? Well, i had a very long conversation with him for these past two days. How that happen? I sendiri xtahu. It all happen naturally. Rupanya we got lot to talk about and we get along pretty well. Who knows kn?

It all started masa tetbe ari jumaat tu i kene bwak fiqah n zuha gi pejabat IM4U tok ambik cek for kteorng nyer program. Fiqah tetbe sruh ajak dia. And i pun xkisah lah. Tpi i yg kene msg. Fine lah kan. Tpi dia xfollow sbb lmbt sgt blasnya. Kterorng dh gerak dh pun. Dia lak mmg xley sbb member dtg. So xpelah. Xkisah pun. But weirdly somehow that conversation x stop situ wlaupun i blas lmbt gle sbb tgh drive. Jln kt kl tu jem gila babeng kay. Xspecially mont kiara tu. How those people lived in that place? Mmg lah kwasan elite lah gak tpi i boleh jadi gila kalo lama2 kt situ tau.

Ok, long story short. We texted smpai kul 4pagi. Teruk gak ah kene bahan ngan fiqah n yanie. Ngek dowh. I was waiting for him to stop actually sbb joe kn slalu mcm tu. But he never did. Sbb tu ler lama gila borak. Wlaupun borak bnde tah pape je kot. But he never stop and i dont know how to stop him. N lagi satu, i mmg enjoy his company. Tpi jgn salah sangka tau. I mmg xde pape feeling kt dia. I masih dlm nk rawat luka, nk focus on me, myself n i. Nk2 lak after i tau ada one of my classmate yg ada feeling kt dia. Mmg taklah ceq nk gaduh psl laki. Nk ambik ler. He was not my type anyway. I nk orng dri JB remember? n other courses than me. I mana lh ske orng sama course ngan i. Nk2 lak classmate lagi tu. Mintak dijauhkan. Haha..

Then it happen again yesterday. Semlm i food hunting ngan gadis2 ayu kt damansara. More to cafe hunting lah. Ya Allah, bpe byk calories and sugar lah aku consume semlm. Esok kene puasa. Ok2. Kt sana tu kteorng terjumpa kedai nama 'doi chaang'. I pun whatsapp dia gmbr n ckp, xsangka hang bkk kedai senyap, xhabaq kt kteorng semua ek'. And the conversation go on. Mcm biasa wlaupun i blas msg lambt sbb tgh drive. Yg laen lak bila fon i buyi lagu 'kim possible' tu, xabis2 ckp. Ha chang msg suha.. Ngek sih. Terok gak ah kene bahan. Ni semua gara2 sbb i digossipkan ngan dia masa program aritu. But everything is a joke. Seriously. Kteorng just played along. Janji masing2 xambik serious psl hal ni. Sbb bnde ni mmg main2 pun. I just tnggu gossip ni lesap n dia or i digossipkn ngan orng laen lak or it just stop or dorng just focus on other people and stop gnggu kteorng. Either way i was hoping.

But then as the night goes late, i realize that.. tak.. i still xde feeling kt dia ok. I teringt joe. We used to had this kind of long conversation. Naturally and cte psl mcm2 bnde. Merapuness and tak merapu. That 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning. Tpi mcm biasa lah ble joe dh ngantok, it just end there. Later2 or esok2 baru smbung. And i missed joe. I missed the old him. I missed us and all the things we used to do or say. I missed everything that involve joe. And i realize that i should stop texted my classmate ni. Tetbe rasa painful lak sbb dia remind me of joe or the things i used to say yg i nk laki mcm joe. Ye nmpk mcm i nk avoid feeling i kt classmate i. Tpi x sbb mmg xde pape feeling pun. Wlaupun dlu ngan joe mcm nilah. He was there when ashraf left and he was there picking the broken piece of my heart. This time mmg xde feeling. X deny x apa. Sumpah. Mmg xde feeling langsung. Fullstop!

So semlm masa dok msg2. Rupa2nya dia ikut gi putrajaya. So of course the conversation stop and that was good. I pun xde intend nk smbung ke apa. But then dia text i lpas i hntr dia balik. He said thanks and apa tah lagi borak. Haish. Kul 5pagi lak baru stop. Just wishing it wont happen today or nnti2. I cannot lah. It make me miss joe even more and this bandage cant fix bullet hole. So it started to bleed again. Wlaupun sekrng i tgh tlong dia ngan subject english dia, tpi kalo dia x text i asking about that thing, i will remain silent. 

Tpi satu je i ske ttg dia. He will always say gudnite, sweet dream, beri salam, bye2. It remind me of ashraf yg dlu masa kteorng together just this one even better. Pastu dia mesti nk jadi the only one yg finish the conversation sbb dia mesti akn hntr emoticon2 dia tu after i lak yg say nite2 blah blah tuu. Or it just his habit. Eh entahlah. Lantaklah. Pape pun, thank you sbb hiburkn hati aku untuk 2hari tu.