Annoyed

Pernah x rasa ble kte nk text or call someone, kita rasa mcm kita nie annoyed orng, mcm ganggu dorng je? So at the end we just cancel everyword that scribble in our mind. Well, pasal scribble tu aku je kot yg buat. Heh.

I mean i love annoyed people. That was part of my charm i guess. But i only annoyed certain people. Those people who really dont care how annoyed i am or still love me to bits how pain-in-the-ass i was or yeah i love them and thats the way i showed the love. Like the girls, my parents, adik and those i pretty much comfortable with.

And i used to annoyed joe. A lot. But these past few.. i dont know.. months maybe. I didnt anymore. In fact i really do feel like i mcm ganggu dia and annoyed dia with my text and question or words. The reason of this kinda weird feeling was in fact came after how we both drifted apart and how he sudden-dissappeared. Everything was so different since that time yang dia menghilang n ignore aku. Terasa gila wei.

So it was kinda okay for me to feel this kind of feeling. After all, he did ignore me that other time. And how seem busy he is these past.. If he still care of me, he would say hello like he used to. Yeah, we've been there joe. The 'busy' excuses was kinda lame and so last year. Kau nie ckp mcm kte baru kenal semlm je doh.

And i know and ada tfikir, who care who text first. I really dont actually. Bcoz yeah we rarely text and i always the first asking how he doing. I dont really mind actually. But lately, i kinda feeling like, yeah, well, i annoyed him. So, i guess thats why i stop and slowly walk away. And aku takut kalo aku dh start text dia. Nnti hati aku wondering. Pastu rindu, pastu gedik nk text dia. Payah. Lagi melarat. Since sekrng hati nie pun mcm dh redha je. So better xyah gedik2 nk text dia. Unless dia text aku dlu lah. Tu laen kay.

And saying how much i miss him and all the conversation we had was kinda pointless bcoz really there's nothing i could do except moving on and accept for what it is and just hope for the best for both of us.

But i really though, miss him. And how we celebrate everytime JDT lose or win by giving pahala free to those yang kene kutuk. Lols. I think no one celebrate the way we did kn joe. We like so legend-wait for it-dairy. :D So epic.

So, after this if i say i miss him or whatever, dont ask me to text him and dont even question why i dont want to text him first. I had my reason and you just need to respect it.

Its funny how we used to talk almost everything, almost everyday. But now we cant barely say hello. How time pass by. How we change and go our own way. I guess what i miss the most of course the old you, the old us and the old me. 

I wish i could turn back the time. Tpi nk nyesal pun xguna. Mungkin nie dh takdir kte kan. Cuma perhentian.