Psl asyari tu sbb i cte psl ashraf actually but she thought i cte psl asyari. I x bgitau nama ashraf pun. I pnggil klcc guy sbb aritu terjumpa kt klcc and mommy knew about it. Tpi nama asyari i ckp sbb mommy tanya yg klcc guy tu ke yg kasi i teddy bear. Then i ckp x, tu asyari. Then dia tnya lah psl ape yg ashraf and asyari buat sekrng. Well, fyi, asyari doing good. Good life, good job, good study, good relationship. He got everything figure out somehow. Nah.. i xregret pun. Everything happen for a reason. I move on and everything that happen i dh lama lupa. Past is past anyway. Sbb i tau kalo dia dgn i, dia akan hanyut ngan i and it wasnt good. Trust me. And ashraf.. well, he still try to figure things out. And ada masa, kterong borak. And since dia dh keje, i ske kacau dia, mintak dia belanja i lah.. But i know i would never meet him and i xnk pun dia belanja i. I owe him much i think. Kalo unexpectedly nk bwat mcm mana lah kn. Bkn i xnk, just i dont know. It was better this way maybe. He was my first love. I still compare dia ngan joe or any guy. Its funny. But yeah, i cherish every moment with him. And i forgave him for broke my heart. And yeah, things happen for a reason. I ckp mcm nie pun sbb i nmpk reason. Tu yg berani ckp. Cube kalo x, seboleh2 dia kata xphm..
Azmil and faris xbyk sgtlh sbb baru kenal kot.. so i got nothing to say.. well, i just ckp dorng nice.. just maybe i dont know them well so kdg2 tu mcm i nie heartless bak kata mommy and farah. maybe dh lama2 kenal nnti okay lah kot.. kot..
and then there were joe... i told my mom the almost truth story. I bgitau mcm mana i kenal joe sebenar2nya. And i owe and explanation. I kenal joe lama dh sebelum betul2 kenal. Msa i darjah 6 or 5, xingt sgt, i n angah sgt nakal. Kteorng ambik fon along pastu ambik number gegirls yg nama pelik2 mcm miss x or blah3. Then kterong kacau. Misscall lah. Text kata nk kenal. Bajet laki lah time tu. Pastu dlm byk2 number, ada satu number kot yg jual number kteorng. And number tu smpai ke joe. Joe kacaulah. Ada satu aritu joe call tanya sape and i bwat suara operator yg nombor anda dail xde dlm perkhidmatan. I busted ngan joe tpi i teruskn je watak i. Into character man.. Haha.. Pastu dh stop. Tpi dlm byk2 number, number dia yg i simpan. I dont know why. I letak tauke jual number. Ble kwn i mintak number mana2 laki i kenal. I kasi number joe. I was acted like, he's ur problem now. I ckplah dia kwn ex i lah, blah3, xingt. Pastu kwn i ckp salah number. I pretend like i dont know a thing. Into character. Tpi kwn i yg bijak tu gi kasi number i kt joe. He text me. Tnye mana i dpt number dia smue lah. Sebaik dia xkenal number i. I pun explain dgn innocent nyer. Tgh menipu tu tau sebenarnya. Tpi ble fkir blik, mcm mana kalo i delete number dia, mcm mana kalo i xpernah kasi number dia kt kwn i, or mcm mana kteorng lost contact lepas tu. Sbb time tu mmg xde intention nk stay kwn. I mean he just strangers. Obviously. Tpi entah last2 kwn baik, he knows me well, dpt jumpa, siap jumpa parents lgi, gaduh, putus kwn, deepest conversation. It was a nice memories. Maybe it was a fate after all. Xde sape sangka i pernah gaduh ngan joe smpai putus kwn. We did. We didnt talk for a month. But since i rasa bersalah n rindu dia kot, i text dia. N pastu dh okay. Cme selalu gaduh and disagree o something lah..
I bgitau my mom gak psl kterong ter deepest conversation. We talked about marriage. My mom senyum je. Tpi i xcte semuanya. The hopes and dreams. The feelings. The figuring things out. Sbb i pun xpasti ape yg dia rasa. So i let it be. I just fill her psl i ngan joe slalu gaduh and dia pernah ckp kalo i ngan dia together, runtuh rumah, kesian anak2. I ckp lah bkn rumah je runtuh, klcc pun runtuh abis. I miss those fight. I tau mcm dia ckp, we both from different world. We argue a lot. Tpi tu yg special. Since i mmg ske cari gaduh sbb i rasa mcm gaduh tu bwat kita dekat. I pernah kot try buat mcm tu kt ashraf. Dia xlyn sgt. He hates fight. So he just let me win most of the time. Kalo ngan joe.. ssh nk dpt ending. Sbb kalo start text je mesti mula topic baru, yg gaduh semlm tu xsettle lgi. But we just let it be.. i wish i could tell my mom that i really really like joe. but maybe the time is not right yet. after all, anything could happen right..
Tpi i adalah bgi hint sbb i just couldnt stop talking about joe. It was a disease! Trust me.
Then lagu 22 play.. i ckplah i xsbar nk 22.. and i dont know why. Then mommy ckp she got married when she was 21. And i ngan selambanya ckp, 'well, i will be 21 and still have no boyfriend. haha.. tpi xpe.. taylor swift dh 23, relax je..'/ my mom gelak je.. xpe mommy. when i reach 24 and i still single, u found me someone.. parents choice always good for us kan?
Anyway, it was nice being open with my mom. Sharing well almost everything. It was really nice and i had a really good time today. I bought a new shoes. Jelly bunny ada sale okay. I rasa kn lately i was more into shoes. I xkisah sgt psl outfit as long as i had the perfect shoes. Well, almost perfect anyway.. I ingt bucket list i kn i nk beli satu bulan satu kasut. Much? Okay, 2 or 3 bulan satu kasut. Thats the best deal i could give. I just love shoes. I just okay. haha.. xoxo