I always prepared for the worst. Maybe bcoz i get use of disappointment that i tend to always preparing myself. Beside, if i prepare for the worst, at least i wont getting a lot sbb dh expect kn. What if i expect it to be nice and good, then it turn the other way around and i will be mad. Like so mad.
So, ble i tau yg i xdpt jpa, xdelah sdey sgt actually wlaupun yeah it will burden my parents. But things happen. Ada rezeki nnti cube lagi. Ye dakk..
Same goes to my upu. I mmg xletak pape hope pun dpt kt ukm or mne2 ru. But alhamdulilah, i dpt ukm.. sbb kalo nk ikut i nyer result mcm tah pape je kot.
Sama lah mcm ble buat presentation. I dh prepared ape nk ckp pastu ble present kt depan i ckp bnde laen. Dia mcm terlari sket lah. Sbb tu i mcm malas nk ambik port kot. Like i just do my best. Kalo teruk xpe, we did try. If it was good, great job nasuha. TEPUK!
And then there was joe. There will always gonna be him. I try my hardest not to think or hope a lot about being with him. But it was pretty had sbb he always in my mind somehow. But i still preparing myself for the worst. Like maybe he met someone, get married or just reject me. Yep, im a party bummer. But that just me. Right now i really enjoy being around him. :)
The thing about me is that i overthinking. It doesnt matter if it was good or bad. But my brain just couldnt stop think or imagine things. Whats wrong with me anyway? I think i really need to learn with the flow and just keep things slow and steady. But its hard. But i try. I will. I think.